10 Ways To Reduce Stress

Stress affects people differently and some people seem to be more naturally resilient. A certain amount of stress is beneficial and can help you feel alive and alert. But once stress reaches a level greater than your ability to tolerate you will feel overwhelmed and your productivity, your relationships, your health and your quality of life may be impaired.


It may at times seem that things are out of control and that you are helpless to reduce your stress. But, you are more in control than you may realize. Stress management helps you to change stressful situations when you can change them; to change your reaction to situations that you cannot change and to make time for self-care.

10 ways to reduce stress:

1. Eat a healthy diet
   Keeping your body nourished will help you be more resilient. Eat a healthy breakfast and eat several healthy meals throughout the day. Try to be mindful of what you are putting in your body.
2. Get enough sleep
   Everyone feels much more frazzled when they are sleep deprived. Establish a healthy bedtime routine to help you prepare to sleep. Try guided meditation to help you sleep more soundly or to get back to sleep if you wake up during the night.
3. Change what you can change
   Speak up, rather than bottling up. Use assertive communication and send complete messages including how you are feeling, a description of your concern and what you would prefer instead. Plan ahead to avoid unnecessary stress from running late or being unprepared.
4. Reframe the problem
   Try changing perspective or finding your sense of humor. For example look at having to wait as a gift of time with which you can people watch, think, read or check your email on your phone.
5. Accept what cannot be changed
   Give up trying to control things that are out of your control—like other people. Try to not label things as good or bad. Appreciate that it just is what it is.
6. Learn to say no
   Ask yourself, “Is this something that I want to do?” “Is this something I am willing to do?” “Is this something I will resent doing?” If your answers are no, no and yes, then say no.
7. Manage your environment
   Create a safe space for healing your frazzled nerves. Find ways to introduce peace and calm into your home. Get out in nature when you can. Look up and be mindful in your environment.
8. Spend time with family and friends
   Build a support network and choose to share your feelings with those you trust. Communicating with someone who helps you feel safe and understood can help you feel more grounded and calm.
9. Exercise regularly
   Physical activity helps to reduce the negative effects of stress. Exercise releases endorphins that help you feel good. Even just 10 minutes of activity that makes you sweat can increase your energy level and boost your mood.
10. Create time for fun
    Laughing is a great stress reliever. Nurturing yourself will increase your resilience. Do something each day, just for fun, just for you.

Managing your stress is a great way for you to take responsibility for yourself in your relationship. The more resilient you are and the better able you are to cope with the stress in your life the less negative impact stress will have on your relationship and your quality of life.

Susan Derry, B.Ed., M.S.Psy., R.T.C., C.P.C.
Professional Counselor & Life Coach
Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course
Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples
Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine